Embrace who you are, especially your compassion

Hi, I'm Phoenix

I'm a human and animal liberation writer—proudly trans and autistic—here to help those who've been marginalized or misunderstood feel magical. ✨

 

Let's Free Ourselves and Others

If you're sensitive, you may feel a deep connection to others' struggles while managing your own. You may battle anxiety and shame that cause you to procrastinate. Yet, you yearn to make a difference, and nothing will stop you.

 

 

Growing Up as a Sensitive Child: I Loved Animals & Felt Different

 

Before I had words or a community to understand my sensitivity, I just knew that I was different—my gender and my empathy for animals. I was picked on at school for being "so gay." Then we did a squid dissection in science class. As I looked down at the dead body before me, I realized: Animals are bullied too.

 

Animals know joy, pain, and unique emotions. What they feel would amaze us, if we could spend just one day being them.

 

A classmate and I buried a piece of our squid, giving them a memorial. We didn't eat the grilled squid flesh served after class. I started learning everything I could about the ways animals are hurt, and the eco-friendlier vegan alternatives that can build a kinder future for both animals and humans.

 

I started writing about a world where other-than-human people were free from our oppression of them. Like me, animals saw the world differently. My dream was to grow up and be one of their dedicated advocates.

 

I was extremely shy, avoidant of conflict, and distracted by all of my own struggles. No one around me seemed to care about animals' rights. I had no idea how I could do it. But somehow, I would.

 

What did you go through as a child that made you retreat into a shell?

 

What did you go through that made you care? 💛

 

 

Your Sensitivity Is a Strength

 

You probably didn't know to embrace your sensitivity as a young person. I sure didn't. The world overwhelmed us. With so much pressure to fit in and "stop being so sensitive," it was hard to be who we were.

 

We are all uniquely sensitive. No matter who you are, you notice key details that others overlook. You care about neglected issues or individuals. Special things bother you and inspire you. We can all learn from one another's sensitivity.

 

But if you ever got the idea your general sensitivity was strong, you're probably right. Highiy sensitive person (HSP) has described someone in the 15-20% of humans with the highest sensory processing sensitivity.

 

Because of how intensely things affect us, sensitive people are more prone to trauma, mental struggles, and chronic pain. Yet, these hardships can hone our potential for ethical sensitivity. We often find that we are highly sensitive towards others—including others of another species.

 

Diverse, we are often more drawn to things that involve helping or caregiving, creative expression, detail-oriented study, communing with nature, spirituality, or holistic healing. I have been drawn to all of these, but struggled to work a regular job.

 

At this point, if we want to reclaim sensitivity it is crucial that we wholeheartedly embrace autism and ADHD. Here's why.

 

You may have heard that autistic people have sensory issues. That's not the only overlap with being a "sensitive person." People who are more sensitive than average often:

 

• develop passionate niche interests that deeply speak to them;
• form attachments to specific routines that soothe them from the overstimulating world;
• find calm in repetitive movements, seem clumsier, or simply move through the world differently;
• and also socialize in a unique and personally authentic way, such as through the way that they talk, initiate social contact, and conduct relationships.

 

If you look up the DSM-5 and read about autism spectrum disorder, it describes these 5 areas of difference as being "deficits." But is it actually so wrong to have a different way of socializing, deeply sensing the world, engaging in interests, forming routines, and moving your body? Is it actually so wrong to be a little less in sync with societal norms, but more in sync with your own unique sensitivity? 

 

While these differences do make us more susceptible to inner struggle, a lot of the struggle comes from being misunderstood and mistreated—and from living in an especially overstimulating modern society that just isn't healthy or accommodating.

 

As someone who had always been sensitive but had thought that autism was an inherently disorderly condition, I was horrified to realize just how much I was taught to disparage these human traits.

 

It took me years to unpack all of the conditioning, and to accept how much I had been taught to 

 

Contrary to misconception, autistic people are not necessarily less empathetic. Sometimes they're actually hyperempathetic, or they just connect with and feel for others in a different pattern from what neurotypical society expects.

 

Society got autistic people all wrong, just like it got animals all wrong. We were assumed to lack true emotion, true connection, true inner richness—simply because we're different.

 

In a capitalistic society that expects us to get things done in a linear manner, ADHDers are another group who feel like misfits.

 

Why do sensitive people often have ADHD? Sensitive people often find that they absorb more information than they can immediately process. Their focus flows to what's meaningful, emotional, or vivid to the senses. This processing sensitivity can lead to ADHD traits such as a delay in starting things, a wandering mind, trouble organizing, and hyperfocusing on some things while forgetting other things. Really, it's like we have a nervous system wired for creative richness rather than speed. My understanding is that in a more holistically healthy and community-oriented society, ADHD and autistic people could be both flourish more easily.

 

So, whether you're neurodivergent (autism, ADHD, other conditions) or just a sensitive soul, it's important to recognize: Sensitivity has been pathologized, even to the point of it being mischaracterized as insensitivity. Uniqueness has been made into a problem. Modern life is, in some ways, hardest on the most sensitive. We end up feeling pressured to conform to a high-stress lifestyle that isn't actually healthy for anyhuman and that causes unnecessary cruelty to animals.

 

In my own life, I found that my sensitivity to seeing an animal in pain united with my own autistic transgender girl pain. How could I support harming other misunderstood creatures, when I myself was a misunderstood creature?

 

I encourage everyone to embrace this kind of morally productive thinking. It's apparent that sensitive humans are more likely to recognize the sensitivity of animals and to feel drawn to these empathetic connections. That's why I focus on empowering people like me to learn about veganism and to include all beings in our picture of who deserves rights.

 

By allowing ourselves to "be sensitive" towards those who've been hurt, we are building new norms that can lead to an eventual societal tipping point for animal rights—just as there were tipping points for LGBTQ and neurodiversity that helped me.

 

Your sensitivity can be a source of ethical leadership, which future generations will thank you for.

 

By embracing who we are, we change the world.

Bad Habits Can't Stop You. Live Your Dream of a Kinder World.

 

Maybe you resonate with what I'm saying, but there are things holding you back from aligning your life with the better world for all that you believe in. I hope that my story helps.

 

After feeling hurt by the injustice to animals and 2SLGBTQIA+ people as a preteen, I longed for innocence and fun. I found it in an online game called Neopets, where I could be anyone I wanted. But while I saved virtual creatures from lava, I struggled to take a single step toward my real goals.

 

Have you ever been unable to stop binging shows or craving endless distractions, feeling pulled away from your purpose?

 

You may have even felt like you were wasting your life while a secret passion gnawed at you.

 

Sensitivity can make us easily addicted, especially when coping with hardship. But self-soothing isn’t wrong. TV and gaming aren't wrong. We just need support to find ease in what feels meaningful.

 

After years of struggling with what I considered to be a true addiction to my virtual pet online game, I was able to leave the game behind for good and get more deeply into projects advocating for real animals.

 

Here are some of my other high points over the years, which I am always happy to connect about:

 

• I went vegan and whole-food plant-based, fueling my vision of a kind, healthy humanity.
   

• I changed my name and came out as a trans woman.
   

• The Lefkoe Method lowered my anxiety so I could dance, speak, and take part in theatre. I then trained in various forms of life coaching, which didn't turn me into a prosperous paid coach but did enrich my own healing and ability to support others.
   

• I gathered signatures for a cage-free law called Prop 12, and I led communications for initiatives to end slaughterhouses and fur.
   

• I went from terrified of sharing my writing, to blogging prolifically on Medium and Reddit.
   

• I embraced neurodiversity and disability pride, winning at our own games and loving being different.
   

• I kept learning over time about the experiences of countless animals and human groups, so 
   

• I lowered the dial on Netflix and I dove into self-taught schooling, reviving my love of learning.
   

• Long COVID drove me to master mind-body work like DNRS, meditation, laughing on purpose, and expressive writing, practicing daily to improve my health and reach more goals.
   

• After experiencing houselessness, and enjoying a number of animal movement jobs and other odds jobs that I couldn't sustain forever, I became financially free all because of sheer luck and privilege.

 

Reach Out to Me if I Can Help With Anything

 

I love doing my best to help others feel a sense of being unconditionally supported. In addition to listening, I am trained in a number of, er, "personal growth games?" that might be fun for you on your journey. For more info, see my coaching page or email me at uberpath at gmail dot com.

 

This homepage has been all about me, but if it makes you want to connect... I'm eager to hear your story.

 

I don't think I've had anyone reach out to me through this website yet, but you are welcome to. You can also just check out my writing below, to connect with me secondhand through my attempted words of love and compassion.

 

How will you dare to be sensitive today?

 

Photo credits on this page: Benjamin Wedemeyer via Unsplash; Alan via Adobe Stock; Erik Kartis via Pexels.

 

Reach Me Anytime!